What is Love?
Indeed, love is misunderstood!
Basically there are only two ways to approach life: through fear or through love. We all know the distinction, but are blind to the truth.
True love is unconditional. Like when you see with a loving mom with her child. She will love her son/daughter no matter what. Good days or bad days, good behaviour or bad behaviour the love of a true parent will not depend on that. Nothing will change the way they feel about their child.
While we grow up, experiences throughout life shape our perspective. Once bitten, twice shy! Getting hurt is were it gets iffy, how do we respond to it: do we build walls and close ourselves off, or do we dare to stay open to love? I’ve done the first, even closed off my emotions and feelings. I built a wall, so I wouldn’t get hurt. Now though, I’ve learned no one could ever reach me there, unless I let them. Now I’m daring to be vulnerable again.
I always thought I was a loving person, not being aware I was holding back. Love doesn’t work half and half. Again, either there is love or there is fear! So as long as I have those walls up, I am in the grip of fear and withhold love. Even though it’s subtle, that attitude to life can be handed down for generations and that’s not a present I’d like to give to any of my kids!
So, I’m breaking down the walls, letting back in the emotions and feelings even though sometimes, those trigger other fears, I just let them be.
Our chatty ego mind likes the status quo. It has many ways to manipulate us. Fear being an excellent example. Ego is a part of us, so it knows excruciatingly well how to push our ‘hot buttons’ where we might buckle. It brings up painful memories and all kinds of stories to paralyze us in our efforts and demotivate us which is why many don’t want to continue through the mud of self-doubt.
It can be quite a struggle to get rid of fears, but it is surely worth it. I’ve had enough of living in fear. Time to let love in and realize; presently there is no pain, just stories! These stories cannot harm me, unless I let them.
Another interesting quote is useful:
“the secret of change is to focus all your energy; not on fighting the old, but on building the new!”
How to let love back into your life?
- Learn to accept yourself completely: the good, the bad and the ugly parts.
- That means really looking at yourself: the rising thoughts, your own actions and embracing all of those completely, without prejudice or favouritism.
- Loving yourself and life unconditionally is learning to be trusting and honest again, turning vulnerability into a sense of adventure.